Debra Beck Author of My Feet Aren't Ugly!: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out Shares Her Thoughts
Posted: Thursday, December 13, 2007
by ngoldman
Norm Goldman
Today, we are pleased to have as our guest, Debra Beck author of My Feet Aren't Ugly!: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out.
Debra has for the past fifteen years been a devoted mentor for teenage girls. In addition, she has created and facilitated her own workshops and girls’ groups through Spirited Youth, an organization that Debra founded to help girls in a positive and supportive way. Drawing on her own experiences and the experiences of the young women she has helped, she makes My Feet Aren’t Ugly resonate with her readers. Currently Debra resides in Sedona, Arizona. Good day Debra and thanks for participating in our interview.
Norm:
Debra, please tell our readers a little bit about your personal and professional background.
Debra:
I am the mother of two beautiful daughters that are now 29 & 30, and a grandson, who reside in Ashland Oregon. I have lived in Sedona Arizona for 9 years and love it. I love Sedona mostly because of the hiking right outside my door and the community here is wonderful. I have owed numerous businesses and done many things. I have been working with teenage girls for 15 years, helping them learn to love themselves from the inside out. I have recently published My Feet Aren't Ugly!: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out through Beaufort Books in New York. My passion is working with girls.
Norm:
Could you tell our readers how and why you became involved in helping girls in a positive and supportive way? As a follow up, tell us more about Spirited Youth?
Debra:
I became passionate about working with girls because I had a very tormented youth. I felt so separated and disconnected from everyone. Those really were the worst years of my life, so that is where my desire to help young girls came from. I created Spirited Youth to help young girls. Through Spirited Youth, I do girls circles (weekly gatherings for girls to have a voice and discuss issue that are up for them), workshops for small and large groups, speaking engagements, and individual sessions in person and on the phone.
Norm:
Will you share a little bit about My Feet Aren't Ugly!: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out ?
Debra:
It’s really a guide to help young girls to become confident, through experiences from other teens and my own personal stories. I also have sections where the girls can journal to make it their own. My Feet Aren’t Ugly isn’t a book that is coming from an adult, telling girls what to do. I have been told that it’s like having a friend discuss issues with you. This is how I work. I’m not there to tell the girls what to do, I’m more of a mentor. I believe with guidance they can usually figure out what they need to do. I help empower them, so they can make good decisions for themselves. If we keep telling our teens what to do and not allow them to make their own decisions, they will never be empowered.
Norm:
Has your environment and/or upbringing influenced your choice of career and writing?
Debra:
Absolutely, I pretty much raised myself, even though my parents were there, there wasn’t any guidance. When I divorced my daughters’ father, when the girls were four and five years old, I went into the work force without many tools. It was very difficult to be out in the working world while taking care of two girls without confidence. I struggled for most of my young adult life figuring things out as I went along. It wasn’t until I started working on myself, building my self-esteem that things began to flow. As far as writing, I have always loved to write, although with a low sense of self, I never considered myself a writer. When my confidence grew, I started announcing myself as a writer, and that’s is when I became a writer and then an author.
Norm:
Is there a message in your book that you want your readers to grasp?
Debra:
Yes, that who you are comes from inside of you, not from the opinions and judgments of others.
Norm:
Where did you get your information and ideas for your book ?
Debra:
From the pains of my childhood and all of the self development throughout the last 25 years. I have had some amazing mentors.
Norm:
Why do you think this is an important book at this time? How has the feedback been so far?
Debra:
Times have always been tough for teens, but today the risks are a lot higher and the messages/media is delivering is a stronger message, especially concerning sex and body image. Sex is very cool today with teens, it wasn’t cool even 7 years ago.
If you were sexual active, you were labeled, and it wasn’t a particularly cool label. The media today makes Sex look cool and sexy. It’s the same with body image, it’s cooler to be too thin, although I have started to see things shift regarding this issue. We have women in Hollywood that are speaking up about how they love their bodies; Tyra Banks is a wonderful role model for girls, because she is beautiful and a model and she isn’t your typical thin body shape, and she is always talking about how important it is to love your body. The feedback on my book has been heart warming. Not only is it resonating with teenage girls, but young women in their 20’s are loving it. I spoke with a woman in her 50’s and she said, “Debra, My Feet Aren’t Ugly has a message for every age." I have also gotten great feedback from educators.
Norm:
Can you tell us how you found representation for your book? Did you pitch it to an agent, or query publishers who would most likely publish this type of book? Any rejections? Did you self-publish?
Debra:
I was actually going to self publish because I just wanted my book for my workshops. I had three different editors tell me I needed to get it out there, to have it published. A friend had told me about Beaufort Books, an Independent publisher in New York. They were a relatively new publisher, owned by Eric Kampmann who also owns Midpoint Trade, a distribution company that represents over 275 independent client publishers. I feel lucky to have had so few challenges in this area.
Norm:
What challenges or obstacles did you encounter while writing your book? How did you overcome these challenges?
Debra:
I believe the biggest challenge writing the book was that I sold my business to complete My Feet Aren’t Ugly, thinking it would be done in 6 months. At the time, I was working through some personal challenges of my own that I believe I needed to get through before being able to be there for teen girls in a whole new way, so the book ended up taking an extra 3 years to complete.
Norm:
How have you used the Internet to boost your writing career?
Debra:
I have had a very content rich web site created that has great articles for girls and parents. I am currently blogging on this site as often as possible. I have a My Space account that has been fun. I am collecting great friends there, Tyra Banks being one of them. I am currently in the middle of two Internet promotions that allow me to use my voice in a positive way, this being one of them.
Norm:
Will there be any unique ways you'll be marketing your book that is different from how others authors market their books?
Debra:
I am just really reaching out to teens and their parents to help build their bond with each other, to reinforce how important it is to have parents to a part of this process.
Norm:
Are you working on any books/projects that you would like to share with us? (We would love to hear all about them!)
Debra:
Actually I have about 4 other projects I would love to start devoting time to. One is a book for boys with the same subject. I am looking at working with someone on this one because my knowledge of boys isn’t as strong as girls. I am also working on a relationship book. Through all of my personal development I have learned to have very fulfilling relationships in my life that are so full of love.
Norm:
How can our readers find out more about you?
Debra:
My web site is a great start, http://www.myfeetarentugly.com . I am blogging regularly and would love comments. There is also a place where you can sign up for my newsletter. Also if you belong to an organization that needs a speaker, I would love to come and share.
Norm:
Is there anything else you wish to add that we have not covered?
Debra:
Just to be kind to each other and remember to love yourself first. Thank you so much Norm, I appreciate this opportunity.
Thanks once again and good luck with all of your future endeavors.
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